Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Pastor's Wives

Recently, a few articles have come across my desk dealing with the pressures a pastor's wife often lives under and the unfortunate outcomes of these real life stories. 

When I was going through my studies in preparation to become a pastor, many wise individuals passed along great insights on how to protect ourselves from moral failings as men within a ministry.  They spoke often of how women would look to their pastor's and see things in them that they did not see in their husbands thus demanding the need to place protections around ourselves in order to remain faithful to our marriage vows.

But, these articles seem to point to a new trend where more and more men are hitting on pastor's wives.  As the divorce rate continues to climb and more and more middle aged people find themselves single again, the number of men looking for a "new wife" is on the increase and the pastor's wife is not immune to this reality.  In fact, many would view the pastor's wife as a vulnerable person because many pastor's are not giving their wives the love and attention they truly deserve.  The ministry has often become the pastor's mistress leaving his wife looking for someone to care and walk alongside of them through all of the pressure's of being a pastor's wife.

As I continue to ponder these readings, I am struck with at least two thoughts.  The first revolves around my need to continue making my wife a priority far above my ministry responsibilities.  She needs to know on very real and tangible levels that I am married to her and not the church.  Secondly, we must be fully aware of the pressures and temptations that so many pastor's wives live under.  So many face what feels like unrealistic expectations and the need and desire to "just escape" can sometimes lead to poor decisions that ruin marriages.

These are sobering realities facing even those who sit in leadership within ministries and all couples must continue to fight the good fight and make marriage a priority.  Here are a couple of great resources that I've come across to help with this; Couples = and Pastor's wives =

Friday, October 7, 2011

Sweet Fellowship and Thanksgiving

It is Friday afternoon and I am preparing to head into my first Canadian Thanksgiving in nearly six years and I have a few thoughts running through my head.  So here we go...

First, last Sunday night I preached on Philippians 1:1-11 and focused in on the sweet fellowship we enjoy and must guard as saints in Christ Jesus if we partner together in the work of the Gospel.  As we head into thanksgiving I continue to ask the Lord to give me a love for the church as He loves the church.  We need to be incredibly thankful for who we are together in Christ and cherish the sweet fellowship we enjoy in Him.

Secondly, I've been thinking a lot this week about my brothers and sisters in the Central African Republic.  As I set up my new office this week, I came across many pictures and memories from that trip that got me reflecting on the things I witnessed and experienced while over there.  I am so thankful for what we enjoy here in North America and must guard my heart against grumbling.  From the material blessings to the spiritual ones, there is so much to give thanks for and keeping this eternal perspective in mind is necessary in order to avoid the spiral downwards into not being satisfied with what we have been blessed with.

Thirdly, I am so thankful for my family.  In a world with so much brokenness within family units, I give thanks for a marriage and family that seeks to firmly plant ourselves upon the principles and truth of God's Word.  It doesn't make everything perfect, but with that foundation we believe we will experience the blessing of a strong family unit which is to be cherished, guarded and celebrated with a thankful heart.

Finally, as I reflect upon the above three thoughts they all have a few things in common.  They reflect our need for others and our need to build those relationships upon who we are in Christ.  May we give thanks for the sweet fellowship we enjoy in our relationships as we strive to keep Christ central.